IMPORTANT INFORMATION FOR YOUR 15th BIRTHDAY
Is a 15th birthday celebration legally required?
No. You do not need to celebrate. However, Title 1402, Subtitle B, Chapter VI, Code of Federal Regulations™ requires all citizens to publicly mark the First Day of paying for speech at the age of 15, unless proof of incapacitation, or exemption is provided.
Do I need to have a speech?
A Last Day speech is a time honored tradition and a rite of passage that all new adults enjoy! Failure to provide reasonable value for time at your celebration may result in InstaSuits™, debts, breech of contract with your sponsor, and premature indenture. Please consult with your parent, guardian, or Lawyer to learn what your specific obligations are.
What should my speech say?
Your speech can say anything!* You, your parent or guardian, and your sponsor will work together to craft meaningful words that your sponsor will subsidize and, in many cases, pay for entirely! Have fun, and don't forget to thank your sponsor. Your sponsor will become an important part of your branding.
*approved by your sponsor
Will I need to stop talking after my celebration?
Absolutely not! Every good American™ speaks. Even people with vocal disorders speak with sign language and other gestures they pay for, just like you will. This is a civic duty! The economy of our nation requires your participation.
What if I say more than I can afford?
Once you become an adult it will be your responsibility to budget your words. If you are not Affluent, you will likely be carrying debt well before your First Day*. Not to worry. You can still speak as long as you do not exceed your debt limit. If you reach or exceed your debt limit, you must temporarily refrain from speaking, gesturing or showing affection. Communicating at this time will result in painful shocks to your eyes via your corneal implant. If you exceed your debt limit and wish to continue speaking you can attempt to obtain sponsorship, pay off a portion of your debt, or enter into indenture.
*please note that some pre-new adults erroneously refer to First Day as Last Day
Am I required to wear a Cuff and corneal implants?
The free Cuff and corneal implants provided to you on your 15th birthday are marvels of technology given to you at no charge by the U.S. Department of Word$. They are required to record and administer charges for words and gestures throughout the remainder of your life.
How do I know what it costs to say a word?
The Word$ Market™ can be viewed on screen from the comfort of your home, or on many screens throughout the dome in which you live. Words, phrases gestures and other forms of communication will scroll and zip randomly across the Word$ Market™ screen, attached to their cost for the day.
(Please note that it is always illegal to point or otherwise gesture to words on screen.)
Why do words change price?
Word value rises and falls based on frequency, popularity, and a variety of other factors controlled by the Rights Holders. Rights Holders work hard to ensure pricing is both fair and profitable. In general the Word$ Market™ prevents word prices from increasing in price by more than $1 in any 24 hour period, but some exceptions apply, such as for high volume Rights Holders. If you are unsure what a word costs, simply view the Word$ Market™ screen and scan for the word you would like to say until the word appears.
Who can own words?
Anyone!* Words, gestures and other forms of communication can all be owned by groups, corporations or individuals — even you! People who own words are called Rights Holders. Rights Holders are the ones who set and subsequently adjust the prices of the word or words they own.
It is also worth mentioning that Rights Holders may also own specific groupings of words in a particular order called "phrases." Phrases may cost more than the set of individual words, or phrases may be offered at a discount less than the total on the individual words. Phrase owners often enter into deals with the owners of the words in their phrase in order to offer you special deals.
*who can afford to purchase words
Can the meaning of a word change?
The 2nd Act of Connotation prevents Rights Holders from voiding, changing or reassigning the meaning of words*.
The Law requires words be used with intent to convey their proper meaning. Failure to do so can result in fines, fees, indenture and, of course, eye-shocks.
*except by majority Rights Holder vote
What if the WiFi goes down? Can I still talk?
Loss of WiFi is an exceedingly rare event these days. However, if you do lose your connection to the tether, you do not lose your responsibility to pay for your words. While you may report any words or gestures used during an outage, it is best to remain silent and only resume speaking once the WiFi returns. If you accidentally speak before learning the WiFi is down, make a mental note of the words you have spoken and report them using the convenient App™ on your Cuff.
For additional information you may purchase the book ALL RIGHTS RESERVED by Gregory Scott Katsoulis
Exclusion of liability
Information is provided here by the U.S. Department of Word$ administration, the Word$ Market™, Butchers & Rog™, the American™ Association of Guardians™ and its sponsors and is subject to change at any time. We are not responsible for financial harm, debts, eye-shocks, or indentures that may result from the information provided on this page, whether correct or otherwise, at any time or in any form. By reading this, you are agreeing to all Terms of Service associated with the above named entities as they have been provided to you by your parent or guardian. (Failure of such provision may be subject to lawsuit or immediate termination.) You further acknowledge that the information provided here is read at your sole risk.
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